Things to help Kayla

Kayla has had a pretty hard time while her daddy has been gone. I think at first she didn't know what to make of things and would get "scared" and not be able to tell us why exactly, among other things that happen with separation. I think it was just difficult for her to express her feelings and everything that was going on was hard for her to understand. She would ask me why daddy wants to work and not be with us. So, we've had to explain things and offer lots of reassurance of course, and we take things as we go along. Things have gotten better since the first little bit there. One step and one day at a time right?

BUT, there are a few things we have done to try and make it easier on Kayla and to help her. Dave especially was thoughtful of things before he left to help Kayla.

Before Dave left for training in Indiana he recorded himself with our video camera reading several books to Kayla and giving her a goodnight kiss at the end. Kayla loves to watch "Storytime with Daddy" and I love it too! Dave was also thinking of a way to help me out at bedtime by "reading to Kayla" for me. Kayla of course LOVES this dvd and wishes she had more! I do too. We love to watch him read to us. He is a lot of fun, and it has been a comfort for Kayla and I. Makenna loves it too. She seems to know Dave's voice and will watch intently with us too. We have home video dvds too that Kayla loves to watch with Dave on them.

I had been wanting to get Kayla a calendar for a long time. It is so hard for a kid to understand the concept of time at her age. She would keep saying, "Tonight daddy comes home, after a really really long time." Or "Daddy comes home tomorrow, right? Because it has been a really really long time." So, after lots of this going on, out of necessity and sanity I went and got a calendar from a school supply store. It has been a nice way to count down each day by Kayla putting up the date and being able to visually track time. We aren't sure when exactly he gets back, but at least she has something to go off of.

I also got Kayla a gum ball machine to help track time. Every night when we read scriptures she can have a gum ball that represents how many days are left till daddy gets home. (She has really shown an increase of interest in reading the scriptures now....) =)

We have also gotten a lot of helps through Peterson's Airman and Family Readiness. They made us pillow cases with Dave's picture on it for us, and then one with me and the girls for Dave. Every month there is a deployed families dinner on base. They do raffles and they check in on us. It has been really nice to go. They also gave us a stuffed teddy bear to record a message, a Sesame Street dvd about deployment on a kids level with Elmo's daddy having to go away for a long time for work and that shows other families that have a parent who deploys, a cooler bag filled with puppets and books (that help kids understand through play about two friends, a bear and a dog, who have to be apart when bear has to go away, but bear misses dog and he will be back), pens and stationary and stickers for writing letters, disposable cameras, and lots of other things. We also say goodnight to the moon, and have Dave say goodnight to the moon when we go to bed, because we can all see it, no matter where we are.

Anyone got any other ideas of things to do for Kayla while Dave is gone?

One of the deployed dinners had a magician who was really awesome! He did one trick with a chinchilla even and had the kids pet it. He did balloons for the kids and he was the most talented balloon maker I have ever seen. Kayla asked for a butterfly.

I was talking to the chaplain during dinner when they were doing raffles. The first one I went to I won the raffle! There were probably around 250 people at that one. So I wasn't paying attention when they were pulling numbers out, what are the odds? But he stopped me mid sentence, because my ticket was on the table, and said I had won! That was pretty cool. I got a gift card.